Monday, June 27, 2011

The amnimals (You know, from that Disney movie..oh never mind!)



Make a note: I am not like the chick above. She scares the bejeesus out of me. Just so you know. 


   I have two cats. Well, I think I have two cats. A black kitten showed up a couple of Sundays ago and she's still in limbo. I'll talk more about that in a minute. But, see, back in July last year, we (family and I) lost our first cat, a Russian blue, when she was hit by a car. She unfortunately didn't die when she was hit but dragged herself home, was found, lived upstairs as I followed her around wiping up her piss and shit before we brought her to the vet and she had to be put down. So I was depressed because my cat was dead. 

This isn't her. This is a Google cat. She looked like this, but cuter of course. 
  
     But don't be really sad. She wasn't a terribly affectionate cat and often attacked during the night. (That kinda sounds harsh, but well, deal) But about three weeks later, our family found a kitten at the local adoption center (or centre, it's spelled both ways, spell checker, don't call me a liar with your little red squiggly lines!) and, uh, reread the last bit, and fell in love. With the cat. That I mentioned before. She's named Chopsticks, but nobody EVER calls her that. I call her Baby and Munchkin and Babe and Princess Prissy, etc, etc. 



This is Google cat two! Yay! Chops looks like this, but with more black and huge ears. Like enormous ears. Think of your grandpa's ears and that's what she has. My cat's cuter too, BTdubs. 
   
    So this new cat arrived in the back. She's incredibly adorable, pure black with subtle highlights, ie. hair like I want, only, you know, not all over my body... Anyway, the little one wasn't accepted right away, but after I got teary (don't scoff, I mean, here was this little starving kitten who could fit in my shoe (not a difficult task actually) who we were going to force to live in my neighborhood, where people intentionally kill outside cats, even though she was tiny and weak and defenseless?) So we brought her in the house. The defenseless part didn't last long because in her other life she was a ferocious lion or tiger, or some other big cat that was big and mean and bit all the other cats if they got too close to her food bowl. 


This representation of my cat (actually Google cat Three but the pissed off look is totally identical) is actually....

...This cat! Roar! This is Google Cat Four, obviously not mine, because well, I'd be smear on the floor, not writing this fantastic post. 


   Oh, yeah, back to the story. This new cat, who was named Moon (weird, it was my father's choice I swear) but was quickly (and secretly) renamed Monkey. <It's because her arms feel like a monkey's! No, it's not a weird name MOM...> Anyway, after Monkey had been living with us for about three weeks, all of us noticed that she had gotten fatter. "Yeah! she's gonna live and be healthy." Even bigger, she grew. "Oh shit, she's birthin'." I denied, my mother believed. She was right I was wrong, don't make me repeat that.  
  So now, the whole family waits in expectation (alright, alright it's just me, go ahead, spoil my moment..) for her to birth her itty bitty babies, who will then go to the adoption centre (because man, we can't take em) and be adopted out, because they'll be adorable and cranky, just like their mommy. 
   So, two cats, more on the way and bi monthly volunteering at a non-profit shelter where they never put animals to sleep if they aren't sick and all the animals live in the lap of luxury, eating like pigs and having hundreds of people pet them continually. 
  Oh, and additionally, I was wondering if anyone could sign up for this so that my organisation can receive a grant to buy their building. Sign up (they don't send spam out, I know, I have all three of my email accounts signed up), go to the 100, 000 dollar idea and vote for -To give our pets "A New Leash on Life"- within the next three days. This is important people and a timed expedition. The pressure on. Live long and prosper. 


Dear god, I just quoted Star Trek. I feel dirty and cool at the same time. Weird.  

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